“This Feeling – Step Two”
Like yesterday’s post, this post takes a closer look at the negative feelings we experience. In the past we may have tried to avoid those uncomfortable emotions by treating them or retreating from them.
Rather than trying to avoid the feelings, let’s look at the second of three important reminders that can help us learn to cope without self-medicating. In the BESOCHEMPS model of addiction, this would be the ‘EM’ or ‘EM-tional urge’ aspect.
When a negative or uncomfortable feeling occurs, Let’s try to remind ourselves that EVERY feeling will pass eventually. No feeling, good or bad, is permanent. Feelings are about the moment – this moment right now. Breathe in the moment and remember that time will always keep moving forward. Change is inevitable and that means that negative moods will change too. Bear it for that moment and however many moments it lasts. Meditation wisdom would ask us to approach the feeling with a sense of curiosity. Consider not even judging the feeling as “bad,” but simply exploring it. Breathing deeply usually helps us find the pause that can help.
Again, the key is to resist the temptation to self-medicate, over indulge, binge spend, smoke, drink, or drug over a temporary feeling. As we discussed yesterday, the feeling can’t hurt us.
Step one – this feeling cannot hurt me
Step two – this feeling will pass
(to be continued)