Our past has the power – for better or for worse – to influence our future. When it comes to moving forward, it can be hard to know for sure what we should hold on to and what we should let go. It’s worth some time, contemplating, meditating, praying, or thinking about getting some trusted guidance.
To simply jettison everything remotely painful in our past could be a mistake. Some of that past suffering can help us as we move forward. Being honestly aware of some past pain can offer us a clearer sense of a better direction. But wallowing in the pain is like wallowing in the mud – it’s going to leave ‘grit in our britches.’ We’re going to continue to feel pain as we move forward.
To be clear, there isn’t a single answer that suits all of us. But I know it is an important question – “What should I let go of as I attempt to move forward?” To ignore all of the past is, well… choosing ignorance! To hold all of our past will make us too burdened to move toward a healthy future. Perhaps “learning and leaving” could be a useful phrase. If we can learn anything from past pain, then we are wiser or better equipped for our future, leaving the past in its place.
An initial helpful step would be to ask our inner child, higher power, guiding angel, or the universe to show us what is helpful. It’s very important that as we look at our past, we do so in a spirit of compassionate inquiry.* If we trust and step forward, perhaps our inner, truest self will know what to hold and what to let go.
When we know what to FORGET, we can indeed FORGE that new, hopeful, healthy future.
*Compassionate Inquiry is a phrase coined by Dr. Gabor Maté who believes we need to inquire within ourselves in a compassionate and non-judgmental manner. Through such curiosity we can gain greater understanding of our learned patterns of behavior.
I claim no rights to this video, but am grateful to post it here for you.
entitled “The Myth of Normal.”
